Infertility, Hope, and Happiness

I get choked up thinking that as of today, my little Jovie is four years old… She was my gift straight from the hand of God that picked me up out of my years of infertility, and sent me into this wild ride of motherhood.

I chuckle thinking about how God answers our prayers in ways we cannot even imagine, because she is so much more than I ever asked for. She is the most outgoing, cheerful, kind, sweet, intelligent, imaginative, and funny little girl.

I love that she marches to her own beat. She is a trail-blazer and champions her own ideas. I love that she laughs with no reservations, I love that she calls everyone “Honey”, I love that she’s determined, and I love that she loves people.

 

Infertility, Hope, and Happiness

 

I remember the day we heard her heartbeat for the first time. I cried. Remembering when we went to our first ultrasound and I saw her little fingers for the first time. I tried not too, but I cried. Remembering that long night of labor, I was so tired, but when they put her little body on my chest for the first time, I cried.

 

I cannot express what I experienced having thought that I would never in my life, get those opportunities. And yet, there I was, and there she was. My baby. My miracle.

 

In everything I write about being a mom, my heart is never far from women who are still waiting for their miracle. I have experienced my prayers become reality but I have not forgotten those years when I could not see the end. When my biological clock was ticking louder and louder with each passing year. When I faced disappointment month after month ’til I thought I might break.

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I have not forgotten the pain of a miscarriage on that cold, sunny day. Or the journal pages filled with prayers and pleas to God for a baby. Just one.

 

While these memories hurt, they are who I am. They are my story.

 

If I can whisper a little inspiration to you, let it be this: don’t close your book if you don’t like where it’s at, you never know what the next chapter might bring. Embrace faith and hold onto hope. Your wild ride might be right around the corner.

“Call unto me and I will answer you and show you great and mighty things which you know not.”  Jeremiah 29:11 (AKJV)

 

 

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39 Comments

  1. Jessica,this is beautiful!. I love that we can share stories of life and God’s hand and Grace in it all. I love you dear sister ( if you adopt me for a sister?). Thank you again for sharing your heart ?

  2. So beautiful. Like you, I had my children after several long, painful years of infertility.

    God certainly works in mysterious ways. A friend of mine has a medical condition which makes it biologically impossible for her to ever have a biological child. And adoption is almost impossible here. But, through a series of miracles, she and her husband were able to adopt two siblings. It was just miracle after miracle after miracle, nothing should’ve worked out the way it did, but it happened! I remember those teary phone calls, I remember her giving up after yet another failed surrogacy, telling me she had to make her peace with it never happening -and all along, God had already put everything in motion for them. He truly is a God of miracles and mercy.

    And happy birthday to a very lucky four year old!

    1. Thanks Becca! I love hearing these stories. Its crazy, because when I was going through my season of infertility it seemed like I the only one, and now I’ve met so many women who have gone through the same thing and have experienced their own miracles. <3

  3. WOW. What a beautiful story!

    I suffered through 4 miscarriages, one at 6 months. My Mom lost 4 babies plus a stillborn at 9 months, and I have other relatives going through the same situation. What a difference it is for us to have God on our side. Otherwise, it would be so very hopeless feeling.

    I look forward to reading more of your blog. Thank you for visiting mine!

    God’s Blessings~

      1. Thank you. I was able to have three wonderful children and Mom had four, but the process to get there was, like yours, heartbreaking.
        I’m so thankful to have the Lord!
        You are welcome, and thank you for sharing your stories.
        Blessings~

  4. Hearing your miracle story reminds me of friends still waiting and I trust God to give them a miracle too soon. May the Lord keep your little girl and give you the blessing of being a grandmother someday. And happy birthday to Jovie.

  5. Happy birthday Jovie! You have a wonderful happy child by your description Jessica. God does answer prayers if we just have faith in him. The next chapter is to be written , but I am going boldly along on the journey. Have a fabulous weekend Jessica , Hugs, Terri xo.

  6. “my heart is never far from women who are still waiting for their miracle.” – Same here. It’s as if the years don’t change the memory and experiences we’ve had of desire, loss, and faith. I’ve had healthy babies and I’ve had miscarriages. I’ve had years of waiting and lots of disappointment, but He carried me through. XO

    1. Its amazing to hear of so many women that went through the same struggles. It makes me want to seek those women out that are in that place and encourage them and let them know they are not alone! Thank you for sharing! <3

    1. Thank you Betsy! You’re right, it is a tough season to go through. I wish I could hug your friend today and give her a little hope for her journey. <3 Thank you so much for visiting 🙂

        1. I know, I’m very conscious of how my pregnancy announcements might make someone struggling with infertility feel. I try to fill it with with as much love and understanding as I can. <3 P.S. Congrats! What an exciting thing:)

  7. This is so beautiful! I can feel your words; they’re so soft, touching and warm! Thank you so much for sharing this great post! Thanks also for visiting my blog and liking a post of mine! I’m so glad! Would love to follow your blog! 🙂

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