The Quiet Work of Learning: Giving Kids Time to Think
Our kids’ minds feed on ideas. Through books that take them to other worlds or the discoveries they make in nature, their minds are constantly creating connections while building the foundation of their personal knowledge.
But children need more than good things to learn. They need time for their minds to make those things their own: quiet moments of contemplation.
John Dewey in his book How We Think, notes, “This process is called reflective thought; it alone is truly educative in value…”
I’ve pondered this idea over the course of teaching and now homeschooling, observing my kids at their various levels and watching how they learn. It seems that some knowledge goes in one ear and out the other, while other ideas grab hold of their attention and eventually become a part of them.
How Much vs. Making Knowledge Their Own
Could it be that what matters most isn’t how much knowledge we give our children, but what they have time to make their own?
It’s so easy to get distracted by the amount of knowledge we want our kids to have or the material we want them to cover. How many books did my kids read? How many facts did they memorize? Did they complete all the lessons?
But truly acquiring knowledge is something different than getting through the curriculum.
It happens when our children have had enough time and attention to take an idea in, think about it, connect it to what they already know, and express it in their own words.
Making Space for Contemplation
We often think of contemplation and meditation as a practice set aside for monks and philosophers. Someone sitting in a hard-backed chair, resting their chin on their palm, lost in deep thought…
But we all need time to process information at some level; our kids are no different.
It just doesn’t always look the way we expect it to.
Your child might stare out the window after you’ve finished reading a story. They might ask a question at bedtime about something you talked about three days ago. They might draw a picture after a walk, or retell a story over dinner, or ask you to read the same book for the tenth time.
Sometimes contemplation looks like silence.
Sometimes reflection looks like play.
And other times, learning looks like a child wandering around the backyard talking to themselves.
These quiet moments matter because children need time to do something with what they’ve been given. They need time to remember, wonder, make connections, ask questions, and relate new ideas to the ones they already have in place.
We don’t have to turn every moment into a lesson. If knowledge is a seed, it’s okay to give it time to grow.
In fact, sometimes the best thing we can do is leave them alone. And know that these moments are just as valuable for their education as all the reading, experiences, and curriculum they are offered.
